Saturday, February 18, 2006

Pink and Green Sombrero.

How I loathe women. A human virus on this planet. God created Adam to worship and adore Him and out of the kindness of His heart He made Eve for companionship, but that hateful bitch fucked it up and women have been a hindrance ever since. There is this cooze at work that has taken a definite dislike to me. Always fucking up my orders. Spreading rumors. However, I will show her. I'll paint her little red wagon.

But, I am not bitter.

A co-worker, we shall call him B.J., is taking a week off to venture to Alabama to visit his sister and has entrusted me in purchasing him a sombrero for him to take as a gift. Make it real festive. Heh, you got it, bucko. But, how I hate going into those Mexican curios shops - the pushy sales people, the bartering, at which I am terrible - but, I agreed and I am a fag of his word. So, after work, I hit the frontera and stomped down the main drag past the dirty Indians hawking silver crosses that will turn black within an hour, pass the taxi drivers who know the feelthiest pussy, past the sad mariachis playing music to no one and walked into a small mercado that sold tacky tourist trinkets. Instantly about five merchants jumped up, caked dust falling offa them, rushing towards me...

"Blankets, meester?"
"Fine leather wallets?"
"Silver jewlrey?"
"Authentic Mexican knives?"

"No, I need a sombrero". I stated. And India Maria escorted me into her dark shop and showed me her wares. Various sombreros were offered until I found the most outlandish and ugly one there was and purchased it for five dollars flat. I later would tell B.J. that I bought it for ten dollars. Yeah, I'm like that. The eyesore was made of straw and garnished with green and yellow ribbons with pink fuzzy balls around the rim. It was emblazoned with Viva Mexico! across the top. Fabulous.

I paid and as the sun went down and the stars came out I started home with my bundle. Turning the corner on my street, I stopped to light a cigarette when from the other side a tall skinny Mexican came running up to me.

"Oye, oye!" He said. He was not bad looking. Goatee. Brown, short hair. Long thin nose. Slim build. He stopped in front of me. He began to babble on about how his grandmother doesn't have any money for gas to heat her house and that she is very cold. He isn't asking for money for gas but he needed bus fare to go see her. I explained to him that I didn't have any change, I only had a ten dollar bill and that I was sorry I can't help him. As I was beginning to walk away, he grabbed my arm and pleaded to get change at the seafood restaurant on the corner. I looked at my arm and then him.

"Look", I said in Spanish, "The place is closed and it's late. There is no where to get change." He dropped his arm and I saw the suffering in his eyes. That suffering in the cells alone. He was junk sick. There was no grandmother. The boy needed money to score for junk. But, he was so damn hot. I played my trump card. I mean the guy was real attractive. "You really need this money?" He shook his head yes. I continued in Spanish. "I'll give you the whole ten dollars if you come to my house."

He looked at me blankly, "What for?" I blurted out to have sex and without a pause he agreed. "Where do you live?" He asked. I pointed just two blocks away. He said his name was "Joe". Not Jose, but Joe.

I pushed my door open and invited Joe in. We both drank a beer as I popped a straight porno into the DVD player. Joe laughed when I pulled out a joint and we passed it back between each other as he sat on the couch eyes transfixed on the blond puta getting the bajeebus getting fucked outta her on screen. Joe took one last drag and looked at me then said, "Listo, Americano?" Joe and I got undressed. What a body. Dark and fucking ripped! What abs! He laid me down on my bed and climbed on top of me grinding his pelvis into mine as he bit and sucked on my neck. My legs wrapped around his hips and I clung to his back, biting and licking his ears, neck and chin. I gasped and Joe breathed in my ear how handsome I was and I tried to kiss him but he would always pull away. Joe was very careful not to kiss me - have to understand, the boy ain't no queer. God, I love this culture!
Rolling Joe over onto his back, I licked down his brown chest and rock hard stomach to his long skinny penis and worked on that for awhile. He hissed through clenched teeth and whispered nasty words in Spanish as I sucked and licked on his cock. He grabbed my hair with his thin fingers and guided my head in a steady rhythm. Joe pulled me back up and pushed me onto my stomach, sliding on top of me, he spit onto my asshole and fingered me so nasty, I squirmed and moaned - lunging up into me, he thrust and pounded until with a guttural sigh he spurt his semen hot into me. Slipping out of me he walked over into the kitchen, he used a dishrag to wipe himself off. I dressed myself in my pajama bottoms and a t-shirt and lit a cigarette as I watched him get dressed. At the door, I handed him the ten dollars, shaking hands and said in Spanish, "Say 'Hi' to Grandma for me." And he was gone.
I took a shower and popped on some Blondie. I looked over at the couch and the mess of yellow straw and green and yellow ribbon. That asshole better like that sombrero.


katehopeeden said...

How I loathe women. A human virus on this planet.
I am gonna assume that is a present company excluded comment ;)

Chris said...

Do you know how much I adore you right now?