Saturday, October 20, 2007


Having is not always as good as wanting.
There was an acquaintance from my last stay here in El Paso. An African American named Trent. Very handsome with a boxers physique. Had women flinging themselves at him. And I did my share of flirting - but he no fag, right - wouldn't have sex with a man cause that's sick, okay. Last I heard he got rip roaring drunk and rammed his car into the El Paso Rescue Mission - cans of empty Steel Reserve flying everywhere. After that he spent time in jail.
The other night, I was returning home late from work when this muscled bulk came lumbering up to me. Intoxicated and dressed out in his thug gear. And the flirting started again - because my chances with him I thought were zero to none.
Well, next thing I know, Trent is lying naked on my bed and I am doing to him that which is inconvenient. Thick muscular body and mythical black cock - I was in paradise. Until he asked for money for coke. Right in the middle of "it". Turned me completely off. As a fact after half an hour of debating and pleading - he was asked to leave. And was he pissed - saying I shouldn't get him worked up and then shove him out the door like that. That's how women get raped, he grunted.
I have changed. Remember Desolation Angel - that obnoxious devil may care asshole of old? Well, apparently he's dead. Gone. Forgotten, hopefully.
I do not regret what I did to Trent - only the regret of asking him in in the first place - but I have become so cautious - so banal. Perhaps I am digressing into an old spinster. Ugh...

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