Monday, February 03, 2014

3am Alcoholic Rant

What is it with American expats not being friendly? Living in Mexico has conditioned me to constantly smile and say hello to random passersby, and whenever I do this to other fellow white people, I get a look of "What are you doing here?". It has gotten to the point where I just give other white people I see a "What are you doing here?" look back.
I have a theory that many of us think that we're special snowflakes for packing up and moving to good ol' Meheekoh, and let's be honest here, we get more attention from the local population because we're foreigners. Most people in our countries wouldn't bat an eye at us, so when we see another white person roll past us, we get jealous that they're moving in our own "unique" dream. "Hey, they're my people! Hey, that's my lady that I buy flautas from out of her storefront! Hey, that's my taco stall! Hey, that's my taxi driver!".
There just seems to be a huge amount of "hipster" cred that people seem to lavish upon themselves.
The other thing that caught me off guard is the complete lack of helpfulness from gringos. I'm now accustomed walking down the street and asking for help from random people if I can't find a place or want to know where I can get something. I've done this with some white people in the deeper areas of Zona Norte, Tijuana and I either get ignored, or when people do help they look extremely annoyed.
One would think that running into another American or Anglophone thousands of miles away in a relatively obscure country would invoke instant camaraderie, but this hasn't seemed to be the case. I get a cold stare, and to be quite honest with you, I feel that I relate more to some of my neighbors that I can barely communicate with than some of these people. It makes me want to pack up and move to some remote colonia.
I've realized a long time ago that border towns on the Mexican side attracts sullen, died in the ass grumpy fuckers who have already laid waste to the joyful spirit of their own countries and communities. They've made every other cunt unhappy at home and long to cast their morbid, cynical, pessimistic, sad misery web further afield. I think most of them are empty inside and maybe they know it. They know they're fake, they know they're losers...hence they drink so much and get stupid and blame everyone and everything else.
I'll admit that I've stated many times that I prefer talking to locals than I do my own countrymen. They just seem to care about things that actually matter - family, daily life, etcetera. In America, it's rare that I meet people who like to talk about things other than themselves. Mexican locals are always interested in you and your family, and will remember everything about you down to the last minute detail. Maybe other gringo's have felt this way as well and don't want me moving in on their turf. It's even like this with people I associate with who are Americans. Whenever I make friends with other Mexican people that my associate "knew first", I feel like they become competitive and will brag about how many Mexican house fiestas they got invited to, how many people they know on their street, how many bizarre yet charming experiences they've had, will start trying to correct my Spanish when I'm talking to Mexicans, and will intentionally not include me in large group events that happen between Mexican locals and Americans, and I'm later asked by Mexican friends "Why didn't you come?" etc. I find this ridiculous and don't understand the jealousy, and I don't even think most people are aware they do it. I think that most expats get wrapped up in this bizarre Messiah complex and feel like they're not worth anything if someone is moving in on their people.
Then again, I always remind myself that I have the privilege in the first place of having the freedom to move to Mexico to live a "simpler life". It's a total First World thing that is quite strange.

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