Brainpootin

The crumbling concrete boardwalk sloped downward into a distant misty haze. Seagulls swooped and dived, a lone figure - black and furtive against the setting sun - walked a small dog at the surfs edge. Huddle next to the bluff out of the all seeing eye of the patrols, a group of six guys huddled and sipped Tecate's and talked and laughed.
I sat on the weathered limestone bench - hypnotized by the crashing of the waves, the silver forever expanse of sea that spread before me. The fiery red ball of sun boiling away beyond the horizon - then yellow, orange, and the stars began to twinkle as I pulled my coat around me shivering and took a long drag offa my cigarette.
I thought of the previous months, last few years, the last couple of weeks and the lonesome kicks started to drift in. People I miss passed in my mind - people I know that I would never see again - they being spread all over my adventures, my travels, pointless wanderings.
A rolling stone gathers no moss, they say. Who wants to be covered in moss, I'd retort. But, I see where they are coming from - I think it has caught up to me - and it is time. Time to gather moss.
I was sitting on the balcony with Chuck the 'Canuck' sipping coffee and chain smoking cigarettes coughing in the dawn - when said I, "You know, what I need to do is - instead of selling all my personals, leaving my place, traveling and then picking up all over again - I should just use this house as my base. Pay you a couple of months rent and go down tom Peru or somewhere next time I get the traveling itch. Then I just come back and relax until the next bout."
"Sounds like a plan to me." He wheezed then falling into a fit of coughing.
Thing is - I am starting to get antsy. Always happens around the holidays - I just wanna go-go-go! But, I am tired - tired of all this seat of the pants wondering. 2700 miles in a week? That's even wacky for me. I am back home though - TJ will always be home - so I guess I need to make the best of it.
Working on my book - it has a definite title now, Just for Kicks - and it horrors me to read it. Seems like a different person. I have changed so much in the last year or so - so much. I even pondered stopping this blog - for what is left to write about? I really don't do anything anymore - and when I do it is the same old shit. And as I've said - I'm even tired of it.
The black waves crashed in the yellow moonlight and I sat on the limestone bench staring off into my abyss - pondering the realities and vindication of my thoughts and immediate goals. Cold crept in amid the swooshing of the surf and I headed back up the dirt road to the house - happy, happy for the first time in a long time at the direction of my life...