Sunday, April 23, 2006

Transvestite Porno Sluts.

The powers that be, the nameless assholes – ahem, excuse me, the city fathers, have decided to close down the Porno Theater that was adjacent to Park Independencia in leu of the grand unveiling of the newly refurbished statue of el primo Benito Juarez and the relandscaped park. Gone are the cruising boys and the pedophiles that chased them replaced by mobs of blubbered families with screaming snot-covered younguns. The day they closed the Porno Theater, nary a queen had a dry eye in the city. I stood there misty eyed myself. A dark day, indeed.

So, I am forced to take my cockjunky business elsewhere. Namely that shithole porno theater on Avenida Lerdo. Small – filthy – obviously built in the 1930’s - only one theater (The other at the park was a grand terraced porno palace sporting two theaters where you could cruise both at your leisure – I’m getting choked up.) the movies played on the curved soiled screen are decent video projections and current runs but the theater is hampered by one thing: the God damn ugly assed transvestites that prowl the two isles on either side of the rows of seats.

Contently sitting in an isle seat, smoking a Lucky, my big nasty out cocked and fully loaded, the sodomy flickering across my eyes, the sounds of grunting and moans permeating the stale musty air. Waiting for one of the Mexican hotties that are there to sidle up and taste my forbidden fruit. But no – the mood has to be shot in the ass by one of these thunderlizards clopping down the concrete aisles, stopping next to me to converse with one of their fellow puta bitches. Not in hushed tones – but loudly and arrogantly quacking away only like they are the only two in the whole place. My first urge is to leap up, screaming obscenities, ripping their ratty wigs off and hurling them into the darkness of the theaters.

Like there was this once when I was cruising around the theater with the rest of the circus and I sat next to this real cute guy. Well, not next to him – there was a seat between us, right – I mean these things must be done delicately, so as not to scare the prey – anyhoo, the guy is grabbing his crotch, giving the signal to go! Go! Go! And when I am about to make my move this obscenely obese cow that looked like Fred Flintstone in smeared Helen Roper drag sits between us and does a complete cock block. The cute guy, disgusted to sit by this monstrosity in frills and spandex – and who would blame him – took off. I went nuts, took out my lighter and singed his wig. I never saw someone of that bulk move so fast. Fucking drag queens, a bring down on modern society.

When I go to a porno theater for an afternoon of leisurely delights, I hate transvestites almost as much as old men, but that is another report.

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