Went to work and popped the question to Brian about moving to San Diego – he is all giddy about the idea. I explained the ups and downs about it – he, of coarse, understood completely.
Day at work dragged as work only can. My manager suspects the affair between Brain and I and warned me of the circumstances of such fraternization, and I accepted her ultimatum. Utter termination of employment. What a party damper. While she went off property on some errand, Brian and I flirted like school kid lovers. A ver.
Talked with my psychiatrist today about leaving for San Diego. She was completely against it – went on and on about how much I had accomplished and what I’d be leaving behind. I explained that I would be leaving nothing and that a place is just a place – I had a better life back west. Plus I would be taking Brian with me.
We then proceeded to discuss my emotional productivity and I related how detached I have become, I like Brian but I feel nothing for him. I feel nothing for anything. I have lost all interest in life and the passion has been burned out of me – I have become so hollow. I also, afterwards discussed this with Brian and he said that perhaps he was the person to restore that fire back into my life. Time, as they say will tell.
I have picked two months from now to leave for a number of reasons. Mainly to save enough money to move comfortably and more so to get to know Brian on a more intimate basis – to see if this relationship is going to work of not.
So the wheels are set in motion and the plans are being made…in two months Brian and I will return to San Diego and perhaps a better life for both of us.
Day at work dragged as work only can. My manager suspects the affair between Brain and I and warned me of the circumstances of such fraternization, and I accepted her ultimatum. Utter termination of employment. What a party damper. While she went off property on some errand, Brian and I flirted like school kid lovers. A ver.
Talked with my psychiatrist today about leaving for San Diego. She was completely against it – went on and on about how much I had accomplished and what I’d be leaving behind. I explained that I would be leaving nothing and that a place is just a place – I had a better life back west. Plus I would be taking Brian with me.
We then proceeded to discuss my emotional productivity and I related how detached I have become, I like Brian but I feel nothing for him. I feel nothing for anything. I have lost all interest in life and the passion has been burned out of me – I have become so hollow. I also, afterwards discussed this with Brian and he said that perhaps he was the person to restore that fire back into my life. Time, as they say will tell.
I have picked two months from now to leave for a number of reasons. Mainly to save enough money to move comfortably and more so to get to know Brian on a more intimate basis – to see if this relationship is going to work of not.
So the wheels are set in motion and the plans are being made…in two months Brian and I will return to San Diego and perhaps a better life for both of us.
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