Thursday, March 01, 2018

these spiderwebs are my home now


You, Dear Reader, literally cannot understand what a debilitating blow it was missing the airline by ten minutes to Cambodia last January. Emotionally, it bore an insidious effect on the old ego. For the past two months I spiraled down from anger to depression to angry depression to simply giving up. I scoured the internet for an affordable apartment in the United States in a plethora of out of the way shit hole towns in lieu of a misguided desire to simply disappear. This notion of finality drove me deeper into an emotional funk.
Yet, last night, as I lay in my windowless room counting down the hours to purchase a plane ticket to one of these dead end burgs to grow dusty and discontent in some section 8 housing, accepting the fact I settled for what all that is, I said no. No, I will not go out like that. I have so much more life to live and I do intend to live it.
The immediate plan? I will bide my time here in Tijuana. The first thing in order is to renew my passport. It is months within its expiration date. Cambodia’s visa policy is you need to attain at least six months left on your passport. It is also essential for me to acquire at least $2000 minus airfare for a start in the Kingdom. I believe this could be done within five months. Perhaps sooner. I’ll simply have to relent on all extracurricular activities, if ya know what I’m sayin’? To curb the monotony, I actually have a new idea for another novel which I plan to begin.
Unfortunately for you, Dear Reader, I will not be posting as much on this blog. Why? Well, for one, the activities I enjoy require money, and my goal is to save as much as I can as quickly as I can. So there is that. I believe I will be using this blog in the encroaching months to hone my writing. That being said...
Let’s do this.

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