Wednesday, August 20, 2014

abstract horror

“Your reports must be much more carefully detailed to be of any use to us. Your experiences must be cataloged...with painstaking accuracy.”
I said it before and I’ll say it again country simple: The Reader will frequently find the same thing transcribed in the same words. This is not carelessness nor is it for The Obsession With The Sound Of Own Words Dept... It indicates space-time juxtaposition...a folding in and back (the universe is curved, whispers a long dead genius)...point of intersection - PAY ATTENTION PLEASE! - point of intersection between levels of proficiency where parallel borders meet...
Tijuana: Easy to get in and hard to get out... ominous addictions on all levels stand at the controls, the yammering rentboy indigence intercepts a fleeing queen’s rush towards the Big Brother frontier, the INS warrant waits in San Diego...
Depression hits full force, haven’t gotten out of bed all day. What is important when nothing is important? Grey pictures on a grey screen, fading slower and slower (Was this before or is it now?) ...Centro: rich yellows and blues in the streets like deep stone canyons, blue doors, yellow lights...little cantinas where sad old Mexican drunks sniff pensively ...Tapas and futbol scores on the wall...
The town is an intricate decomposing concrete/wood construct. In some places six stories high overhanging the street, propped with beams and pillars and bent telephone poles to form porticoes where the inhabitants can keep out of the swarm of baying fat tourists who crowd the disintegrated concrete...
“Hey meester, you wanna see what’s in my shop?”
“Farmacia?"
“You want some pussy?”
Clandestine, snarling pimps flow beneath blistering humming neon sipping horchata under the obsidian eyes of placas, lean against outcroppings of rusted steel and crumbling masonry, speak in silent, rigid gestures, frescoes of elusive decadence, flat, two dimensional, more over telepathic...plaintive boy-cries drift through the night...“Saul. Pepe. Juan Carlos. Donde vas?” Stale patter of commerce: “A ver Maburro!” (Look here, Marlboro!) “You want juicy pussy, Meester?” “Mexican straw hats?” “Leather bullwhip?” (The best Mexican hats are not made in Mexico.) A hideous mouth blows smoke rings into the night...“Fuck me, Meester, soy muy caliente...”
Orale.
The humid night invades the city in great rank hustler infested parks where rats infected with putrescent disease romp through ruined kiosks, the stone Emancipator, tired horse and tired rider...stone generals resemble frozen lunatics who advocate liberty under the ever-glaring eye of the withered Zonky, two old Mayan pedophiles, fine as an ivory chessman, convene on an anthropomorphic limestone seat, sipping limonada... scrutinizing the rent boys slinking past, hawking their asses…
The smooth brown crotch of a pimp swells and rots with syphilis, nacos blink in the sun, preteen boys sit in long rows under shaded galleries reading manga comics - they do not move their legs as people walk by...
There is something here the casual tourist never sees nor finds, dirty undershorts thrown over a disintegrating concrete balcony, blistering iron roofs where nondescriptive florae in grimy plastic containers grow on perilous terraces, federale in a black uniform and black glasses, the dull life-sick hate congested in his eyes like scorpion poison... Smell of el Mar and the mud flats, sewage and drying marijuana... There are sinister hoochie houses in Centro stocked with doped-up whores, purposeful agents of disease - the doormen, expert pickpockets like all in the area, can lift the generalissimo’s wallet with a macho goose and stomp a drunken faggot into the asphalt...
A young man named Juan Carlos moved in next to my room, asphyxiating me with futbol scores...thin and sickly and continually fidgeting with candles and religious icons of that condescending bitch Guadalupe, goes on and on about his novia and lack of funds to support her...A cockroach crawls slowly up the blue chipped paint wall...I look out my window to the hotel across the street. A dark-skinned whore of Aztec descent with floppy breasts and discolored teeth stood in the door and asked for a cigarette from a scrawny young man...She steps in and takes off her pink slip and stands naked...the young man drops his ragged pants - erection swinging free - and lies down on the dirty bed, smoking a Delicado, hard and waiting...
Cut to the Plaza...Spilling out in abstruse cavorting and sudden static outbursts of violence, a young man leapt to his feet brandishing a rusty machete and spinning around, scream...No me toca, maricones!...His eyes light up, flicker and go out...he collapses and shits his pants with fear, the police surround him and stomp him to dust. Tourists are warned theft and murder are epidemic in Tijuana and usually go unpunished...there are entire areas, blah blah blah ...tourists amble about with the shadow of paranoid madness in their eyes...
Stroll through The Park for borrowed flesh. An old queen consumed in frustrating passion, fidgets on an iron wrought bench. Two young men saunter past him shirtless in the summer heat, arms around each other’s necks and corrugated abdomens, the image seducing his fading flesh to entertain young buttocks and thighs, loose balls and spurting cocks. A boy turns, snarls at him and spits, “What are you staring at, ugly faggot?” Their boy naiveté violently slashes across his sagging face and drooping torso. Inside he screams, outside an enigmatic mask of dark glasses and ashen face… 

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