Life - and I think you will agree - is all about choices.
The longing I have in this turbulent life I lead is the simplest of things. As I have mentioned before: A small circle of friends, a job I can tolerate and supports my means, and a small apartment. My problem that has plagued me for years, is every time I get stressed out or bored of whatever was going on at the moment, I would roll up my gear - shun the responsibility of confronting it and leave town. Start over with sparkling insight and a new disposition. However, after a short time the same calamities would arise and I would find myself on the road and in a new local, usually some hobo infested dump - lonely and depressed, struggling to start over again and again and again.
Yesterday I was all but set to pack up and head back to El Paso, Texas. I must admit that I did have a small loathing of that change - I knew what I had to endure once I returned but the handful of benefits outweighed all the vile crap that I expected. So, in the late afternoon I visited the cafe in Plaza Santa Cecilia where the majority of my good friends work; Daniel, Victor, and Felipe. I said goodbye and after the cafe closed invited them out for one last beer. I had also text via cellphone for Alfredo and Sarah, two co-workers from Petco Park to join us.
As the night progressed and the buckets of Corona flowed, each had their say about me leaving and the general consensus was that I should stay and seek employment. All very heartfelt discussions, albeit intoxicated. So, I agreed I would stay even though I had no intention of doing so - my mind was made up to leave. Alfredo was the most adamant about me staying and hit the nail on the head - and I paraphrase: "You shouldn't leave, dude! You have friends here, close friends that think you are cool and who love you. Look at Felipe, you have known him for years - are you just going to throw that away? You have family here - you have us!"
Indeed. All this while spraying spittle and the smell of sour beer onto my lenses.
So, it seems I have attained the first of the three needs I want to attain. Felipe did a karaoke routine that he changed the words to include me and our friendship in it. Sarah - dear little Sarah, was the most of the heartfelt ones. Who knew that one of my best friends would of been a girl - a species I have loathed in disgust for all these years?
After this drunken yet entertaining debauchery we had, all said good night and as I returned home, I thought. And I thought hard. I am highly intelligent - albeit a little wacky - but I need to stop running from my problems and confront and conquer them. Returned to my crappy room and I lay there in my bed - the intoxication of the hundreds of bottles it seemed of booze I consumed wracking my body - and I decided; no...I need to stay here. I need to confront my demons here and now. No more running. No more adventures. Okay - maybe little ones - but the point is, good friends are hard to find and I hate to be alone.
So - why not?
Yesterday I was all but set to pack up and head back to El Paso, Texas. I must admit that I did have a small loathing of that change - I knew what I had to endure once I returned but the handful of benefits outweighed all the vile crap that I expected. So, in the late afternoon I visited the cafe in Plaza Santa Cecilia where the majority of my good friends work; Daniel, Victor, and Felipe. I said goodbye and after the cafe closed invited them out for one last beer. I had also text via cellphone for Alfredo and Sarah, two co-workers from Petco Park to join us.
As the night progressed and the buckets of Corona flowed, each had their say about me leaving and the general consensus was that I should stay and seek employment. All very heartfelt discussions, albeit intoxicated. So, I agreed I would stay even though I had no intention of doing so - my mind was made up to leave. Alfredo was the most adamant about me staying and hit the nail on the head - and I paraphrase: "You shouldn't leave, dude! You have friends here, close friends that think you are cool and who love you. Look at Felipe, you have known him for years - are you just going to throw that away? You have family here - you have us!"
Indeed. All this while spraying spittle and the smell of sour beer onto my lenses.
So, it seems I have attained the first of the three needs I want to attain. Felipe did a karaoke routine that he changed the words to include me and our friendship in it. Sarah - dear little Sarah, was the most of the heartfelt ones. Who knew that one of my best friends would of been a girl - a species I have loathed in disgust for all these years?
After this drunken yet entertaining debauchery we had, all said good night and as I returned home, I thought. And I thought hard. I am highly intelligent - albeit a little wacky - but I need to stop running from my problems and confront and conquer them. Returned to my crappy room and I lay there in my bed - the intoxication of the hundreds of bottles it seemed of booze I consumed wracking my body - and I decided; no...I need to stay here. I need to confront my demons here and now. No more running. No more adventures. Okay - maybe little ones - but the point is, good friends are hard to find and I hate to be alone.
So - why not?
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