The neighborhood mooch - he being my far too handsome young friend named Squirt - just left my apartment...well, with a little less of Yuletide cheer.
He had the downright audacity to appear at my door and to request no less than $120 to purchase a Christmas gift for his high maintenance girlfriend. He would borrow it, he said. Paying it back, later.
"You don't work." I stated. "I'll never see it, again."
After fifteen minutes of his whining and pleading we came to an 'agreement'. He must really love that girl of his. He walked out with money in hand a look of embarrassed anger on his face. Happy Holidays, Squirt, hope your girlfriend's mother doesn't ask why you can't sit comfortably during Christmas dinner.